Happy New Year! It feels strange to finally be back to blogging but I’m so glad that I’ve managed to pick up my laptop and start somewhere.
In all honesty, 2016 hasn’t been the greatest year for me. And no, not because the UK voted to leave the EU or because Donald Trump was elected US President. And no, not because of the mountains of celebrity deaths that happened this year, either, although all of those things were rubbish too! But I’m hoping that by doing a recap on the year will help me to appreciate the good things that did happen this year and move on from the bad. So here goes!
In January, I saw in the New Year full of hope for the year ahead. I had just received news a couple of weeks earlier that I had managed to secure a traineeship at a law firm for when I finally complete my postgraduate diploma. I genuinely couldn’t believe it when I got the phonecall and spent most of January and February awaiting an official letter to offer me the position, which I did finally receive in early February. As I’m still seeing so many of my friends and peers at university struggle to find a traineeship, I can appreciate even more now how lucky I am to have secured this job and I’m now really looking forward to starting this September – I’m actually going to be a lawyer!
Things started to deteriorate slightly more rapidly in late February/March, however, as my dissertation deadline was looming and I found that I had not done nearly as much work as I should have by that point. I ended up in a terrible habit of regularly staying up until 6am and wakening again at 11am to study the whole of the next day until 6am again for weeks and weeks on end until I finally completed all 11,000 words of my dissertation. It was a massive relief to finally hand it in.
My relief was shortlived, though, as I unfortunately received the awful news that my grandad had been diagnosed with leukemia and he ended up spending over a month in hospital so things were turned upside down for a while, although he’s thankfully doing a bit better now.
I then had my exams in May which wasn’t easy given everything else that was going on at home and in my personal life too. I got through it, though, and finally completed my last exam of my undergraduate degree – a massive accomplishment, especially as I had completely fallen out of love with university at that point!
In June, I spent the week away in Edinburgh with my boyfriend and tried to distract myself from the degree results that I was expecting. We didn’t have a release date for our results, but knew roughly when the exam board would be meeting and so I suspected that I would be getting my results either when I was away or as soon as I returned home. Three days into our stay, I woke up to a text saying that my degree results were in – honestly, I didn’t have much hope. I fully expected to get a 2:2 degree which would still have been an achievement, but wasn’t the result I had been striving for over the past four years. It was such a shock, therefore, when I realised that I had actually managed to get a 2:1 degree in Scots Law (Honours) and I couldn’t help but randomly burst into tears over the next few days as I celebrated. All the stress and worry had actually been worth it and I didn’t dread graduating as much anymore!
My graduation took place just a short month later and it was a wonderful day spent with my family and my boyfriend – the weather even stayed good for it, which is rare in Scotland! I’ll admit, I was super nervous and trying to organise photographs, tickets and my outfit beforehand just made me stress even more, but I managed to make it across that stage without falling in my heels which is what I was most worried about!
At this time, I was working part-time having managed to secure a temporary position with the charity that I’ve been volunteering with for the past four years. I was really looking forward to it, but unfortunately I found that the more time I spent there, the more fed up I became and soon I couldn’t wait for university to start again. I found out after my graduation that I had secured a place for my postgraduate diploma at the same university I did my undergraduate degree at and that I would be starting it in early September.
At this point, I feel obliged to warn anyone who’s reading that the rest of this post doesn’t have a happy ending – all the good things that happened to me throughout 2016 have now been written about and September is unfortunately where everything really fell apart. I mentioned previously that after I had handed in my dissertation, my personal life started to suffer and things came to a head in September when my relationship with my boyfriend of four years ended. Honestly, I’m not sure how to write about it as it’s still quite fresh, raw and painful but this is also around the time that I completely lost motivation for blogging. I’m not, of course, solely blaming that as university had become quite hard at this point as well – my life just became so hectic and different very quickly and I found it quite hard to deal with so unfortunately blogging just took a complete backseat.
Thankfully, I have managed (for the most part) to keep up with my work at university and I’m working towards overcoming the issues that I’m dealing with in my personal life. A lot still hurts and it’s been difficult to go from having the rest of my life planned with someone to not knowing what the next year will hold, but I think I’m getting there, one baby step at a time, and I’m learning a lot about myself. It’s hard to stay hopeful for 2017 but I’m going to work hard at focusing on improving myself, spending more time with my friends and family and getting through my diploma so that I can start my job in September and move forward with my life.
And hopefully I won’t fall away from blogging like this again!